vision

last night
i made a list
of the boys
i had slept with
once i was satisfied
that it was complete
i fell asleep
and made a list
of the boys
i had slept with
in my dreams
it was you
and i could feel
my mouth
as i kissed
your shoulder
my tongue peeling
pieces of you
away from you
closer to me

i woke up
the same way
i fell asleep
in my underwear
but i was naked
in my dream
and the mirror
that catches me
every morning
doesn't undress me
or make me look
towards reflection
or anyone
if i don't want to
but i want to
and that's why
i put my bed
where i sleep
where i wake up
next to where you will find me

period or the end of a sentence

i hurried home to my vices
and looked up the word truth
while we waited for a storm to come

i thought about the symbolism of a bath
as the sky began to brood in its saga
the lightening, the thunder, the clouds

tell the story like an opera
the only players in the theater of rain

one happens in response to the other's drama
delayed and i can't help but wonder if
the lightening knows it is what thunder is made of
or if thunder will use lightening as an alibi
do clouds understand they cannot hold what they contain
do the elements recognize they constructed a you and an i
if the answer is no then how did i come to question why not
if the answer is yes then how did you come to question why

i suppose that's what a good story is made of
unforgettable characters and questions asked long ago
a series of events more convincing than the answer

but that's also the difference between you and me
same as the difference between build up and climax
mundane carelessly cast amongst a stage of epic
a summer's day held against a full, wet, orange sky of literal
a monument to bleak built beside confessions of euphoria
i am windswept and thoughtful because I am
void of skepticism and without fear in the face of dilemma
i am windswept and careful because i am not an effect
and the elements respond to you and i
with a song and a secret that whispers who
who are you and who am i and who holds the reigns of a siren

i think my vices are like heels in the stirrup
and symbolism is a free ride to anywhere i want to go
and this storm was a good example of you and i
because it stirred up more sensation
than a rumor or a cowboy counting to eight
and i don't know the difference between rain, you, or horses

Competitive by Nature

you can't win them all
but if you want
you can hurt a little
for what you lost

Catalyst

Today took me back
Here I was last year
Etching out a word
Refining language
Every word I spoke

Well now I speak
In pun and trance
Let it bee means
Let's start a buzz

Breathe deep
Each breath

Forever is melody
Lulling winter with a song
Of long days and resonance
With every ear it catches
Etching memories like code
Responding to infrasound
Suggesting something untold

RSVP

who are you
what face are you wearing
when no one is looking
where are you now
why say so
how did you get here

cast and release

a fish out of water
remembers water
and suffers
in its absence




the world is a fish
love is water

oddside in insight out

i understand how i don't care
can be
a true statement

what will they think of me?
i don't care

what if they don't like me?
i don't care

i understand how i don't care
can be
the worst thing ever

when are our troops coming home
"i don't care"

what's going on in other worlds
"i don't care"

what i don't understand
is willingness
to surrender freewill

"you can't speak against your government"
yes i can

"you can't speak against our religion"
yes i can

what i don't understand
is
murder and suicide

i don't want to kill you
i don't want to kill myself

i don't want you to die
i don't want to die

i understand
we're all going to die
and i don't care

so long
as it's not
against our will

clichés and aphorisms

some words are said

because they sound clever

or melodic

or pretty

or to the point

or all encompassing



some words are said

it doesn't cost much
to look expensive
and i'd take a cheap apartment
and clear conscience
over dirty money
any day

or

"and time
goes by
so slowly
and time
can do
so much"

or

the drum
is
the heart
the harmonica
is
the ache

or

choose
your
words
thoughtfully
and
lovingly

or

the things you should do
and
the things you shouldn't do
are easier to swallow
when
you practice everyday

Mister. -mister

Are you in love with me?

-in a way

Don't be.

-but i am

Don't be.

-i already am

Then don't break my heart.

-i already did

No you didn't.

-yes i did

No you didn't.

-has your heart ever been broken

Yes.

-that was me

energy created by space

space is stillness
a corner collecting dust
spotless middleground

space is preconceived
it existed before you
is made up of you

matter as a fact
proves everything we do
and disproves nothingness

matter as fiction
is thinly veiled
because there is an overabundance

uncatchable flights or radar

u
n
c
a
t
c
h
a
b
l
e

f
l
i
g
h
t
s

o
r

rr
aa
dd
aa
rr


pretentious is a trapeze artist
waiting
or reaching forward and hoping for
what happens next

Boredom

i balanced my check book
again
so now that i know
that i can't spend
any money
it's all i want to do

i arranged my living room
perfectly
and now that everything fits
i feel a strong urge
to throw
a new chair in the mix

i accepted someone's old clothes
subsequently
i have nothing to wear
to places i don't go
but my
closet and drawer space is overdrawn

i decided to count words
instead
of syllables or a freefall
and i'm still really bored
so bored
i'm not going to write anymore

Tall Tales

i am as dumb as an ox
i have no idea what is going on
why am i so blue
and who the hell is paul


if i were sluefoot sally
and you were pecos bill and we were hindsight
i would pet your horse
and sit right where i stood

Cynic vs. Optimist

life is a series of other people's deaths
vs.
death is proof that i am alive

i drink by myself because i am lonely
vs.
i will toast to anything, cheers

die a million deaths
vs.
live a million and one lifetimes

you broke my heart
vs.
you made me stronger

you are ignorant
vs.
i don't understand you

i hate you
vs.
i forgive you

why are you doing this to me
vs.
patience, patience, patience