Really but Not Really but Really

Want me to tell you what I do in my apartment
I dance and move things around
Watch my feet in the mirror
Organize my thoughts and things
Try on dresses one by one

A lot of time is spent in front of my computer
Or sitting in my kitchen
Making and checking off lists
Music keeps me company
I sing when I know the words

Little projects are stashed in drawers closets and corners
I clean out my old purses
Little pieces of paper
Remind me of thoughts I had
Or nights I had forgotten

I try to stay busy or rest as much as I can
Tinkering with the balance
Sometimes I stay up too late
Or sleep too much on Sundays
Either way I wake up fine

Togetherments and Complexes

Away

I want to be a wild animal
wth primary colors
something feathered
talking
talking
fluttering
No, no I take it back
I want to be a pirouette



Regretful

I shouldn't say it's simple
Love is simple
And I can't take it back




Capitol and Rock

I wish a was a totem pole
and you could stack different versions of me
on top of me
until I seemed complete

In my mind you are a catch
but this is a totem pole
so there's no line to throw


Explaining Away the Absent

Well there are only so many souls to have
and only so many bodies to have them
so some of us had to go without them
That's why we share

New Apartments

I can't live like this
chasing after candles that won't light
believing in a love that is common
but not commonplace
but I do
and I have
and I will
and sometimes I cry
and it feels like everything inside of me is outside of me
unreachable
and I cry
because I don't know what else to do

Yes!

I would like a rodeo
to pick me up
buck me 'round a while

or let pirates steal me away
they could paint my eyes black
I do that anyways

I would pick a fight with a stranger
sing a war song
bruise another eye

put on a hard glare
but I can't sing another war song
and you have the most beautiful eyes

Sometimes I completely exit reality
Beg to be countered
Beg to be heard

And I will put it all out there
And you should too
because there is only little ol' me
and then there is you

Fedoras

The knowing is in the doing
I've been having trouble sharing my life with people
because I've been busy with thinking
and thinking
and thinking

Well I never said there was action lost in thought
but most of us aren't mind readers
and the better part of us
think seeing is believing
Seeing is believing.

Names

Torn apart
Presented in pieces
I hope the entire picture is not lost

I showed up wearing my Betty Crocker dress
halfway through the set
I was the only one dancing
until the night wore on

The calender was a good plan
Pre-emptive preparations
for a sadness that cannot be measured
A happiness you cannot outlive

My movements do have intentions
sometimes my words do not
Sometimes I count and deliver

I wonder why I let it carry me away
and search for measure and order

of the highest choir of voices
and something I never considered
to be true

To be true.

And so what if it is perfect the first time
Never quite to be the same again
Different is okay too

Remember the time I was beautiful
and I do the same for you

Because I don't believe in odds
on this particular occassion

Hats

There's a girl that wears her heart on her sleeve
She's above the law
When she laughs just so at some secret thought
About a boy out there who glows in the dark
He says go as you please
And the girl she just smiles
Happiness stretched across her face

Jolene

There must be something more


much more than what I've pretended to know


not much more than what I've known


all I know is love





One time, last New Year's Eve


I drank champagne until I couldn't stand


so, naturally, I fell into a Magic Hassle set


The bass player picked me up so quick





I gathered my bearings


along with my floor length leather coat


and found myself in the parking lot


Hey Baby, Baby you should take a shot

Well, everything else I learned from fairy tales

and the admissions of musicians and friends